An answer to a Hozer BiShe’ela

I've never been an Ultra-Orthodox in any shape or form, so I cannot share your experience in that world. From my encounters in that world, I did see many problems, but also some good and greatness. I do not like the culture of cover-up that is so rampant in the UO world, but I do like those who are true to their beliefs and way of life, especially, those who allow themselves to be exposed to the rest of the world, yet choose to stay as they are - not an easy task.
In any case, you must have something going on between your father and yourself beyond that comment he'd said to you. Think about it, he criticized you, but parents do criticize their children. On the other hand, when the subject of criticism was not present, he wanted to talk with you but you've denied him, so between you and your father, it's not clear cut who is good and who is evil.
But the biggest issue really is to distinguish, here in the blogsphare and in real life, between people with agenda and people who REALLY respect you for who you are in low key. You will find, although you may or may not be able to recognize the phenomenon, that many people who are like you, in various stages of departing from frumkite, do have such an agenda. They seek to justify their move, they want to prove, to the world, but mainly to themselves, how correct they are by doing that move. Some of them are fanatics in their new deity-less or anti-deity religion. They would not refrain from any move, any bit of propaganda, to convince you to go with them. In fact you would find whole websites, dedicated to take people away from religion akin to similar websites dedicated to ‘kiruv’ (bringing people back to the religion.) The only observed difference between those two opposing but similar types is actually in favor of the ‘kiruv’ sites because they are positive, they are ‘full’ of LOVE to you and lack the hatred that the other kind is full of.
You may have left your previous world, but this world has not left you. You may choose to fight against it or to make peace with it. As a young man, you would tend to choose the former, but for your own good, please reflect on the issue. You may find that the latter option is by far better.